Circa 10/10/2014

This picture came up in my facebook memories.  My Mom had come to town to take care of us after we found out about Lainey.  The girls had hope and excitement to have a baby sister.  Mom took our minds off everything going on around us.  

This picture is so incredibly painful to me.  Trying to make the best of a bad situation.  Kaylie's young and naïve hopeful heart. She prayed we'd have a baby after all, she was so excited.

I managed to get through the entire day today and no one knows the tears I've shed.  Not my husband, not my friends, not my kids.  While I write this a friend is sending me messages on Facebook, happy, cheery...she has no idea my eyes burn from the makeup in them.  I even spent time at the movies dying inside.  Thought about running my car into a tree on the way home in the dark and rainy night.  

My God, when does this pain end. Almost 4 years later, no one wants to hear about your grief.  

HoCo 2018

Levi invited Kaylie to homecoming this year.  Before dinner we took some photo's at 

Levi's house with friends.  

 I suggested Levi and Kaylie stand up for a few pictures, they stood straight up, side by side with their arms down and Levi's friends were like, "No, no, you have to do it like this" and they wrapped their arms around each other and continued to instruct Levi and Kaylie until they had their hands in the right place.  It was so funny!  

Kaylie and Levi, both 15 and Sophomores.

The kids did a few more fun pictures before heading off to Pomodora's for dinner.  At Pomodora's they meet up with another set of parents and another couple. 

 They made it to the dance and had a good time.  Kaylie commented that Levi opened doors, pulled the chair out for her to sit down...he was a perfect gentleman.  I'm so grateful there are Momma's still raising their boys to be gentleman!  

This year I did not get one decent shot of Lexie dressed up in her Homecoming dress!  She and her friend Lauren fooled around too long and missed daylight picture taking.  UGH!  

a perfect split

Today is my 27th wedding anniversary!  I was up early, dressed in work out attire, because you know I'm going to go work out...

Walked the dog.

More like I let smokey meander around the back yard as I plotted out the perfect backyard snapchat picture I was going to take.

Walking across the wet grass in my trusted Asics tennis shoes, I stepped with my right foot onto a small dock.  No sooner had I stepped onto said doc, did my foot effortlessly sail the length of that dock, while my helpless left foot remained planted on the grass.  The force of being pulled forward brought me down across the dock, right leg stretched beyond capacity while the left leg buckled under pressure and slammed into the dock.

The PAIN!

The HOLY PAIN!

I knew I had to get up, the dog was unattended.  The girls were still getting ready for school.  I called Kaylie on her cell and asked for help.  They both stood at the door gawking at my miserable struggle to get back to the house.

There would be no work out today, there would be nothing but elevation and icing.  It was horrible.  So horrible in fact I would not be able to actually drive all weekend.  Then when I did, I had to use my left foot for an entire week to drive.  Week two I could use my right foot for gas, but I had to break with my left.  By week three I could drive again, but let me tell you my leg and my derriere, still ache like a tooth ache if I am not careful.

Believe me, I'm careful!